The afternoon after the White Emperor's palace, there was a little confusion about what exactly was the next item on the itinerary. They said we were going to take a boat down the Yangtze river to see some gorges. But weren't we already doing that? And the third boat they mentioned just seemed like a translation error
Well, sure enough, right after we got off of our boat, we boarded a slightly smaller boat. We had some company from other boats. The white boat you see right there can double as a spaceship.
The concept of docks hasn't quite reached China yet. All they need to do is tie a bunch of boats together, and they're set.
These views were some of the most beautiful ones we've seen yet. Why don't you have a look?
This here is a bona-fide example of Chinese terrace farming. It's really incredible. These farmers spend lifetimes maintaining these little, three or four foot terraces along the sides of mountains so they have a flat place to grow their rice, even if all the land they can get their hands on is a little scrap of mountain.
Anybody forget a ladder?
Now the third boat we took looked a little like this. It was the job of these guys to belt out some Chinese songs every time a boat came round. Now that's a job!
If you thought their job was good, check out this guy. He doesn't even have to sing. He just sits in a hut high up in the mountains and plays his kazoo every time a boat comes round. See if you can see him, real small in that hut. His hut must have been hundreds of feet up in the mountains. Mention fear of heights during that job interview and you can go see yourself out.
Our guide had one hell of a face. There's some great faces here.
Our guide was a real great guy. Lots of pluck. See that headset he's talking into? Talked the whole time, nonstop, and we didn't understand a word. Turns out, he was just asking us for money the whole time! Who knew? At one point he took out this goofy clothing, and let us all take our pictures wearing it. Here's me looking dapper
You know what's in these caves? Coffins. That's right, coffins.
It seemed unfair for the Chinese folks in the earlier picture to do all the singing, so Alex Wand, our Mississippi Bluesman belted out a song for them for a change.
Those boat rides were by far some of the most beautiful sightseeing we've done yet. Look at that water, it's pleasant turquoise, clear, deep deep water. The further in we got the greener it got. No smog either, just beautiful gorges, beautiful water, fansatic mounpains.
The whole boat ride(s) back, there was always someone yammering away on the loudspeaker. We figured on the way up she was yammering about the history of the gorge. Turns out, all she was doing, the whole time, was trying to sell us shit! Books of stamps, commemorative coins, pictures -- the works!
There was one last stop on the boat after we got off the boat before we got onto the boat, and that was an ancient city moved stone by stone up the mountain to preserve it from the 178 meter rise in water resulting from the construction of the Three Gorges Dam, the biggest dam in the world. The main drag of the city was crowded, of course, with the customary fried fish and tourist crapola shops, but venture off the beaten path just a block and you discover that there's a whole abandoned thousand year old city out there for the exploring. Light fixtures and windows were only partially installed, like the city got enough funding to get started, and figured they'd raise the rest from the tourism, only the tourism was only just enough to sustain one street of chintzy shops.
Unfortunately, this was the last picture I took before the batteries in my camera kicked it, but our Video Wizard Alex Howard got some really fantastic footage of the city. We explored it for so long we almost missed the bus back to the boat.
The next day, we woke up bright and early again to travel down an ancient Chinese mountain path done over in concrete for the convenience of the tourists. To get there we took a traditional fiberglass Chinese dragonboat. The design of these boats has not differed for thousands of years. We knew were were in the real deal when the guides actually insisted we wear the doofy life-preservers. As you can see, the Chinese really know how to travel in style!
If you bounce up and down on one side of this floaty bridge, it sends about 20-30 feet of it rocking and rolling. Note the precarious walkway in the upper left corner of the photo.
Everyone walking up the stairway to the precarious walkway.
At the end of the precarious walkway was, you guessed it, more fried fish shops
This cat knew what was up. There's no trash cans on the Ancient Concrete Precarious walkway, so folks just throw their trash right on the ground. This is the least skinny stray cat I've ever seen.
Omnomnomnomnom
Next stop, the biggest dam in the world. Over in the distance, through the smog you can see it. The sign claimed this was a "Very clear" day, but it was so smoggy in fact that you could hardly see the other end of the dam. I wonder what a bad visibility day is like! The generating capacity of this dam is immense. At 22,500 MW, this dam has the highest installed capacity of any power station in the world. It's 181 meters high and 2335 meters long with a reservoir of 39.3 cubic kilometers. The project displaced some 1.3 million people along the shores of the Yangtze.
At the top of a big hill next to the dam, from which the above picture was taken was a little temple to the dam. Here's Wiz Kid Videographer Alex Wand, doing what he does best, to get some priceless b-roll for our movie.
All this? That's trash.
Chinese women find light skin to be very beautiful. It's the opposite here in America where everybody's so crazy to get tan. We couldn't figure out what this ladies deal was. Was she afraid of SARS, or was she tryna stay pretty? Trya stay pretty she said. We never got to see that pretty face of hers.
Behind the dam
Whoosh!
The dam was so wide I had to turn the camera diagonal to fit it in one frame!
Lots of power
Well, there you have it folks, the end of our sweaty, poorly ventilated boat trip on which everyone came down with a cold. Ping claimed that we all got colds because we were standing in front of the three working air conditioning units on the entire boat after being out in the heat. I thought it might have something to do with being crammed on the stuffy, muggy, poorly ventilated, moldy old boat with a couple hundred other people, though. Right before we got on the boat in the first place, we stopped at a market, and there was this one fruit seller who kept on sneezing all over her fruit like it was her job. Just wouldn't quit. I blame the guy who bought those plums for the cold.
Next up: some grand slam pieces of Chinese embroidery!
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